The Memorable Doctor And The Forgotten War
by Sir Hawkeye Who
Summary: A Doctor Who MASH crossover. The 3rd Doctor and Sarah mistakenly land in South Korea 1951...read on find out more.
1. Martinis and My Blue Heaven

The Memorable Doctor and the Forgotten War 

_While you're up in your beds, dreams of killing in your heads…_

In the silence a lonely American corporal was keeping watch for enemy soldiers.

_Nothing but despair lies in wait for to change your minds of hate…_

"Who's there?"

_Underneath the blood red skies this is where you shall be trailed… _

"Who's….Oh my God.. Back up! Lieutenant!"

_For nothing is as it should you will be changed from evil to good…_

"Aaaaah!"

_So in your barbaric fright, our armies walk this night!_

A small innocent pool of blood trickles down into a trench at the frontlines in South Korea.

* * *

The weary surgical staff of the 4077th stepped out in the piercing sunlight from the soft gloom of the operating room rubbing their heavy eyes full of relief and some sorrow after losing three patients amongst the two hundred and fifty that were sent to them all of whom were operated on by Major Frank Burns who as usual blamed his nurses. Captains Pierce and McIntyre were the first to trudge away yawning painfully sensing the still and their beds in the Swamp (their tent).

"Seventy five hours of meatball surgery. Gotta be a record. Trapper I'm sleepin' for a week. Then wake me up put a drip full of your finest martini and connect it to my veins and let me sleep for another week and have a nurse wake me up every few hours to prevent me from shortin' out and top up my drip," proposed the aching Captain Pierce.

"Sorry Hawkeye I was hopin' you'd wake me up after two weeks of sleep and do the same," apologised Captain McIntyre to his best friend as they edged closer to their rest spot.

"Move!" growled Major Burns pushing Hawkeye And Trapper aside and headed into the Swamp ahead of his two colleagues.

Hawkeye managed to catch the door as it was about to slam into his face "Oh now come on Frank you now they would have died before you started.." began Hawkeye shoving the door out of his face .

"Yeah coz they ended up havin' you as their surgeon," grinned Trapper as took his place on his bunk.

Frank chose not to answer. He grabbed his Bible , took a glance at his mother's photograph near his bed which was autographed by Pierce and McIntyre…_Dear son, Dad is not your real father, Love Mom…_and crashed his way through the doorway which Hawkeye was still holding open walking in the direction of the camp priest's tent (Father Mulcahy) but then changed his mind and headed for the Officer's Club still wearing his operating dress and white coat thrusting his cap down further on to his face.

Hawkeye let the door go and it surprisingly slammed shut straight away.

"Come on today was bad even for Frank. Three dead and all his patients," Trapper said consoling himself after what he said trying not to feel guilty pouring himself a drink and then passing the jug full of the clear liquid to Hawkeye.

From outside a petite blonde headed nurse passed the window and waved at Trapper. He waved dreamily back to her, got up and turned to Hawkeye "You bringin' a girl to the movie tonight?" he questioned glancing back out of the tent material every few seconds.

"What movie is it?" Hawkeye sensed there was a nurse out there.

"King Kong I think and probably a Bonzo movie too," Trapper edged impatiently towards the door taking the last swig of his martini.

"Nah I'm ok I gotta send Dad another letter anyways. You go ahead." Trapper did not need to be told twice. He jumped out of the door and followed the nurse like a dog.

Hawkeye smiled to himself, took a sip from his martini, brought out his notepad and began to write…."Dear Dad. Isn't it funny how life knows just where to get you sometimes. Frank Burns was once again a shambles in the OR but this time his stupidity cost three lives which I, Trapper or Henry could have easily saved…."

* * *

This time he had was crucial to enjoy now before the Brigadier would call him back to Earth to help. Turning the dials on the ship's console and moving to the other side to view flight data from the data bank , moving back to the other side to change the dials and repeated this process several times. He began to whistle a song that had been on his mind for a while not quite being able fathom what it was exactly. Suddenly it clicked with and he danced around the console as he continued his routine. Then he brushed some dust of his velvet smoking jacket and neatened up his laced shirt.

"Ah yes. My Blue Heaven a charming song. I know America 1951 that shall be grand," the man said cheerily changing the dials once more. " Sarah we're going to America, 1951," called the man in the direction of a white door at the side of the console.

"Wasn't there a war on at the time?" queered a female voice from the next room.

"Don't worry we're going somewhere away from the talk of war," reassured the man with a tone of seriousness in his voice.

"How long will it take the TARDIS to get there?" questioned Sarah again.

"Oh about ten maybe fifteen minutes maximum," answered the man in his friendly manner.

Turning the dials once more he check flight data of the TARDIS one last time before being absolutely certain that she (he affectionately called the TARDIS female) would land in the correct place.

* * *

Ten minutes had passed and the man was certain the ship was ready to land. He called out to Sarah to alert her but as he attempted to land the TARDIS a gushing sound was heard and she jumped a time stream then landed with a slight thud. The man and Sarah were knocked off balance and had fallen onto the console.

"What happened Doctor?"

"I'm not sure. Let's take a look,"

The Doctor steadied himself and walked to the TARDIS door and opened it with Sarah just behind him.

"Oh dear," sighed the Doctor

"What's wrong? This is 1951 isn't it?" asked Sarah to her friend.

"Yes..," the Doctor began and rushed to the console to check the data "…it is 1951 but this is not America…It's South Korea!"


	2. What's it all about Henry?

* * *

"Sir…"

No answer.

"Captain…"

Silence.

"Hawkeye.."

Still there was silence.

"Hawk.."

A groan was heard from the depths of the Swamp.

The boy took a breathe, pressed his curved glasses on to his spotted lizard like face, gently pushed the door open called out the name once more. Once again all there came was a low grunting sound. The boy sighed, opened the door again, grabbed a bucket of freezing rain water from out side and threw it's content at the bunk from where the sounds came.

"Ah! What the hell are you doing Radar? I'll give you to the count of one to get out of here!" grouched Hawkeye rising suddenly from the depths of his inner sanctum.

"Colonel Blake wants you in his office, now" answered the boy in his usual way.

"If I knew everyone was gonna bug me I would have never come to this war," pouted Hawkeye thrusting his boots onto his feet. "Well go on Lassie show us the way," he teased as Radar walked off in front of him towards the Colonel's office.

* * *

The Doctor slammed his fist onto the console in rage "I was checking the flight data and I went into history of America and it highlighted Korea so that's where we are." He rubbed his left hand through his ghost white hair and hung his head "I'm sorry Sarah.. I'm sorry that I brought you here," sighed the alien.

"Well it doesn't matter Doctor how about we take a look around? Ey?" Sarah proposed to her down hearted friend. The Doctor smiled slightly but did not look at Sarah. He then walked through the TARDIS door, with Sarah in tow, locked the TARDIS, scanned the area, took Sarah's hand and began to walk in the direction of a group of tents that his hawk like eyes could see but Sarah could not.

* * *

"Ok Henry what is this all about? I was havin' a real nice dream of me marryin' a white fish when Flash Gordon of here woke me up," grumbled Hawkeye pointed Radar then indicated his damp clothes.

"Radar," called Colonel Blake but as usual Radar was already in the room.

"Sir?"

"Good job Radar," grinned the Colonel as he noticed the agitated face of Hawkeye as Radar entered the room.

"Thank you sir," answered Radar returning the smile and then disappeared back into his own office giggling as he also realised the expression spread of Hawkeye's face as the rain water still dripped off his hair and down onto the floor.

"Ok, well..." coughed Henry trying to compose himself (no, really trying to prevent himself from laughing) "I got a report today from Seoul that our new chest cutter isn't gonna make it."

"What?! Henry we need this guy we barely made it with the last batch of casualties!" protested Hawkeye rising from his chair abruptly as if something had jolted him on the bottom.

As Henry was about to answer his other Captain, Trapper burst into the room "What are you doin' Henry? I got a girl out there who I'd really like to get to know better. This better be important."

"Well..." began Henry but was interrupted by Hawkeye "Our new chest cutter ain't gonna be here Trapp"

"Oh come on Henry we need this guy real bad we can't cope with Frank's stupidity if we weren't up to our armpits in patients ourselves we could have saved them three soldiers. Us three can't pretend to be four good doctors anymore we just can't!" Trapper panicked his fearful eyes fixed on Henry.

Before Henry could explain further Father Mulcahy came into the room "Excuse me Colonel I have a message for you from Major Burns," politely stated the Chaplin pulling a scrunched up piece of paper from his breast pocket. He raised his eyebrows, took a breath and began to read "Blake I will not come to your drink fest of a meeting and you can tell those two...lunatics to go and soak their heads," recited Father Mulcahy turning slightly pink having to change a word or two of what was written in Major Burns' crude handwriting. Then gasped slightly as he saw the dripping Captain Pierce "Why Hawkeye have you spoken to Major Burns?"

That cheery anecdote lifted the other three and for the first time since he became in that state Hawkeye laughed. He cackled uncontrollably for a minute or so. "Glad I could help," beamed Father Mulcahy with some pride.

"Where was he at the time he wrote this Father?" questioned Henry managing to stop himself from getting to the point of Hawkeye's fit of the giggles.

"In the Officer's Club Colonel," he answered. That was that. Father Mulcahy was in the presence of three giddy school children who by now did not care that they were laughing at Frank Burns or not.

Father Muclahy began to chortle a little as he remembered how Major Houlihan was trying to steady Burns's head with one hand and his writing hand with the other whilst he spat his angry words onto the page that brought so much joy to the other surgeons.

"Oh yeah where was Hot Lips?" continued Trapper with the broken conversation trying to steady himself on a chair.

"With him,"

And that brought business to an end for a while as this tonic of laughter helped remove the angst from the room. Then in came Corporal Maxwell Q Klinger in a particularly beautiful silver satin evening gown and royal blue high heel shoes with his rifle over his shoulder.

"Klinger?" Henry gathered himself from the floor and motioned to his Captains to do the same and they obeyed.

"Ready for guard duty sir!" shouted Klinger presenting his rifle to the Colonel then saluting him.

"Anything I need to know today Klinger?" Henry rolled his eyes and wondered what was his Corporal going to put before him to certainly guaranty his discharge.

"Nothing sir just wanted to say how proud I am of being in the army sir!" barked Klinger who turned on his heel and marched out whistling a military tune.

Henry sighed then silently counted to three.

At the end of that period Klinger pushed his head around the door "Can I have my section eight now?"

Without hesitation the Colonel shook his head.

"I won't give up Colonel I'll be out of here I will," promised Klinger and he strutted outside shouting "I comin' home to you Toledo!"

"Ok, ok," Henry more firmly now began his announcement again. The matter clouded over the 4077th as in the not so far distance loud screams of pain, gunshots and a frightening chanting was heard. The war was raging but not as it was written to be.


	3. Mines and Klinger's new friendship

* * *

Scrambling his way down the Cliffside the Doctor came to a flat piece of ground which was so near to the huddle of tents. Sarah slid down behind him scuffing the bottom of her flowered dress.

"Wait," the Doctor gently ordered Sarah "This seems far too simple." He picked up a stone and cast it out into the middle of the field. With out hesitation the ground blasted up underneath the stone and destroyed it instantly.

"Just what I thought…a mine field,"

The Doctor took Sarah's hand and slowly and carefully manoeuvred through the field. The dusk was dying and night rapidly began to fall around them. As they made their way through the field the Doctor slowly gripped Sarah's hand tighter until they reached the other side. They glanced back at the field, then at each other and sighed with relief before moving on down the path. After walking a few hundred yards the Doctor suddenly stopped and gazed up at a sign above the entrance to a camp.

"Ah this is it, the best medical unit in Korea. MASH 4077th, the best care anywhere," the Doctor's strong eyes made out the words on the wooden panel while Sarah by now just didn't bother to try and read for she knew there would be no point.

"So you think it's the safest place to be?" queered Sarah after being silent for so long.

"Well not from an air raid point of view but there are doctors and nurses here so you decide where you'd rather be," the Doctor stated plainly to Sarah.

"And what about the TARDIS?"

"She'll be fine. Thank Rassilon the safety bubble still works. Honestly Sarah she'll be fine. I've had Genghis Khan's soldiers trying to get in there before now and the TARDIS didn't even receive a scratch," the Doctor reassured Sarah offering his arm to her.

Sarah took it and ambled with him through the row of tents finding no point in asking the Doctor what his plan was as he often said "I make it up as I go along."

From out of the darkness came a deep voice "Halt! Who goes there? Friend or Foe?"

"Friend!" shouted the Doctor brushing some more dirt from his green smoking jacket.

"Ok, what's the password?"

"Well now then, it's, no it can't be that or maybe, no or possibly, never. Well by my calculations the password is My Blue Heaven," the Doctor smiled after analysing the facts.

Silence.

"Correct. Step forward friend and be recognised," the voice called again to the Doctor.

The Doctor and Sarah Jane walked into the dim light where in front of them stood a short Lebanese man in a satin evening gown. Indeed it was Corporal Klinger.

"Who are you sir?" questioned the confused Klinger bringing his rifle down to his side.

"I'm the Doctor and this is Sarah Jane Smith my companion," answered the Doctor simply.

"No kidding we got lots of doctors around here, hang on the Doctor? Colonel Blake will want to speak with you follow me," Klinger beckoned the two and he marched neatly away towards Henry's tent with the Doctor and Sarah strolling behind and Sarah trying as hard as she could not to laugh at the sight of Klinger.

"It's strange," Klinger tried to begin a conversation with his two new friends. "We don't normally get British people here."

"Wouldn't be surprised it's an American war," the Doctor answered rather sharply not to Klinger but to himself because he still hadn't forgiven himself for bringing Sarah to a war zone.

"Yeah well you guys have more sense I guess. God I hate this war. Oh yeah also we don't really get doctors who bring their own nurses either," Klinger tried to continue .

"Oh we're not.." Sarah began but was stopped when she noticed the Doctor had his fore finger pressed to his lips.

"Wait here," Klinger said striding away from the visitors and he knocked on Colonel Blake's door.

A groan was heard.

"Sir the Doctor is here to see you,"

Another groan.

"Excuse me a second would you?," Klinger politely told The Doctor and Sarah "Oh my God what are you doing with the Colonel's gin?!" Then he clicked his gun and was about to fire his bullet when Henry scrambled out of the tent.

"Did you catch him Klinger?" the befuddled Colonel asked.

"No sir I made it up. This sir is the Doctor…" the Doctor waved and smiled politely "..and his friend Sarah Jane Smith," and Sarah copied the Doctor's greeting.

"And what do they want?" Henry whispered in the Corporal's ear.

"Well I think this is the guy who's replacing the new chest cutter unless that is the chest cutter sir," answered Klinger softly back to Henry.

"Oh right umm Doctor and umm Miss Smith I'll have a meeting with the both of you tomorrow morning then. Uh Klinger show them to the VIP's tents please," Henry asked Klinger before going back to rest his mind again muttering something under his breathe.

Once again Klinger marched across the compound with ease in his heels with the Doctor and Sarah in tow until he reached two vacant tents.

"So Doc you take the one on the left and Sarah you take the other one. The Latrine is just down a few tents to the left. Take a gas mask with you if you know what's good for ya. Breakfast is at seven but it would be safer for you just to skip that, trust me.

"Thank you.. Klinger isn't it?" queered the Doctor a grin.

"Yes sir,"

"You're a good man Klinger too bad not everyone is like that," the Doctor thoughtfully spoke.

"I totally agree Doc well watch out for Major Burns he's a bit of a jackass," Klinger confessed, he seemed to have complete confidence in the Doctor for some strange reason.

"Don't worry Klinger me and the Doctor know how to cope with people like that," Sarah smiled.

The three new companions bid each other goodnight , the Doctor and Sarah turned in for the night while Klinger strode back to his position more happy than he had been for long time.

* * *

Well this has more movement in it althoguh less characters sorry about there not being much Margaret in the story so far . Will deff put her in the next chapter. I hope u guys like it sorry if it sucks . 


	4. Hi Everybody! Hi Doctor Smith!

* * *

The next morning as the day began to break Radar awoke the camp with his terrible bugle solo. He heard so many shouting and swearing but he continued to play. He wasn't to be silenced.

Suddenly a fleet of rain drops caught him right in the face and he stood frozen, his bugle strewn on the ground the cold had complete taken him by surprise. Wiping the drops from his glasses he noticed the cackling face of Hawkeye who was now placing the bucket back precariously by the door of the Swamp.

"Revenge best served ice cold," declared the triumphant Captain bowing to his chucking and applauding audience with an almighty grin on his face.

"You ruined it, the only military thing about this place with your childishness Pierce!" growled Burns who appeared in front of Hawkeye as he turned back into the tent.

"Takes one to know one," he said in a ten year old's voice and poked his tongue out at the Major.

"Ahh.. Don't yell Pierce!" Frank cried out clutching his head in obvious pain.

"Don't you yell at me then!" Hawkeye challenged back completely aware of Frank's situation.

"Shut up Pierce!" the Major grabbed his skull tighter, slid backwards onto his bed and put his pillow over his head.

"A definite improvement Frank!" Hawkeye called out even louder than before.

Frank's muffled answer contained some words that would make Father Mulcahy shiver.

"Major Frank Marion Burns how dare you say that to a fellow officer!" screeched Hawkeye at the top of his voice .

Frank screamed, got to his feet and hurled the pillow at Hawkeye who by now had left the tent. He threw his blanket over his head and tried to block out anymore noise.

* * *

The Officer's Mess was the usual commotion of grouchy responses to the "food" that was placed in front of them. Private Igor the server shrugged at each moody personnel that passed. Everything seemed normal. Then the new arrivals walked in. The Doctor straightened his lace shirt, took Sarah's arm and escorted her into the mess tent. The eyes of the camp all stared as one. The Doctor could not have cared less what they thought. As his eyes scanned for the Colonel he noticed Klinger beckoning he and Sarah to join him at his table. He politely obliged and sat opposite Klinger who still was wearing his tiara from the night before but he had a fur coat and stole on this time instead of his gown. Sarah was about to sit next to the Doctor when she decided that odd little Klinger would be splendid company and sat down next to him.

"Good morning Klinger, lovely day," Sarah decided to speak first.

"Yeah especially Radar's soaking. It'll be even better if there's no casualties," he declared shoving a spoonful of grey mush into his mouth.

"Indubitably Klinger," the Doctor added placing a plate of similar mush in front of him.

Klinger instantly noticed the other people on the table staring at their friend's new guests.

"Oh sorry," he wiped some grit (pretty sure it's grit) from his mouth "Right guys this is Sarah Jane Smith.." Sarah waved on cue "And this is the ..Doctor.." Klinger never thought about asking his name.

"John Smith," the Doctor gave a bright smile to everyone around.

"Ok, other guys'll be here in a bit but this is Sergeant Zale the supply Sergeant.." a dark haired man of a similar height to Klinger waved and grinned. "This is Private Igor, in charge of this lovely slop we're havin' .." a tall thin man in a dingy apron had just slumped down next to Zale on the table and glared a little at Klinger "…and this is Lieutenant Kelly" and at the end of the table sat a plump girl with her hair in pigtails and a brimming smile on her face as she waved frantically flapping her arms.

"So what rank are you Doc, you look too well educated to be a Lewwie or a Captain," blurted out Klinger noticing Nurse Kelly glaring at him.

"We recent that Klinger," came the voice of Hawkeye from just behind the Doctor.

"Yeah we're just mildly inferior. I do put the toilet seat down you know," concurred Trapper who stood at the side of Hawkeye.

"Oh Doctor Smith and Sarah Jane this Captain John McIntyre .." Trapper smiled and shook the strangers' hands "Just call me Trapper"

"..And this is our Chief Surgeon Captain Benjamin Franklin Pierce."

Hawkeye copied Trapper "Just call me Hawkeye or Rasputine depending on how far I have to walk to get a drink that day."

"Nah Hawk that's Frank now," grinned Trapper

"Oh yeah but I'm sure Rasputine knew how to handle a hangover," quipped Hawkeye back. "So uh Doctor Smith.."

"John Smith."

"Oh good I thought you were gonna say Trapper then," Trapper laughed a little at his own remark.

"So anyway Doc what's your rank? Sorry if it's a bit rude to ask," Klinger went back to his point.

"Oh sorry not at all, I'm a Major," the Doctor answered simply noticing Klinger mouthing "I knew it".

"Sarah?" Klinger turned to her obviously wanting to know her rank "You're a Lewwie I guess"

"No actually I'm a Captain," she said just because she didn't want to be seen as typical.

"Wow and you're only a nurse?" Klinger was acting purely on impulse now and receiving glares from neighbouring tables as well as the second glare he had now received from Nurse Kelly.

"I decided to stay a nurse, I didn't believe I was good enough to be a doctor," Sarah started to build the foundations of her false identity but stopped at that when she noticed that the Doctor's smile was beginning to vanish quite rapidly.

Major Houlihan entered the tent knowing well that there was a new Doctor here and she strode towards the table where he was sitting and he had his back to turned to her although quite aware of her presence. He decided he would let Klinger introduce her as he had introduced everyone else already.

"Doc.. Major and Captain Smith this is Major Houlihan head nurse," Klinger declared indicating her with his eyes.

"Yes, thank you Corporal I can introduce myself," she boomed slightly thrusting her hand into the Doctor's face.

"Pleasure," the Doctor quickly reacted and sharply shook the Major's hand as he knew army folk loved a sharp hand shake apparently the sign of a good solider they say.

Sarah copied the Doctor and then respectfully saluted her superior.

"A Captain huh? Well it's nice to have a Captain to command they seem to have more discipline, because of the responsibility they have," Houlihan stated in her military tone. Hawkeye and Trapper were about to make a snide remark when she added "Well most are." Then she sat herself down beside the Doctor and was about to ask some questions of him especially his and Sarah's lack of uniforms but then Henry came to the table with Radar at his side.

"Attention!" Radar barked but no one took any notice apart from Major Houlihan, The Doctor and Sarah.

"Lay off of that Radar we're trying not to lose our appetites over here," Klinger complained vigorously mashing the mush on his plate.

"Well gang how are we this morning?" Henry cheerily started another of his light hearted conversations.

The camp grumbled under its breathe.

Henry sighed at his pathetic response. Hawkeye and Trapper moved further down the table and Henry slumped down beside the Doctor and Radar at the side of his Colonel.

"Doc I'm sure you know our Colonel, Colonel Blake," Klinger continued with the introductions.

"But folks just call me Henry. I'm real sorry about yesterday you kinda caught me at a bad time," Henry humbly said shaking the Doctor's hand with a genuine smile on his face.

"No don't fret we were caught by an enemy sniper and our jeep was destroyed we had to walk for ten miles . There was nothing you could have done," The Doctor's plan began to come to light.

"Okie dokey ," Henry was still trying to keep things light hearted but then realised how stupid "Okie dokey" sounded.

"Well uh.."

"John Smith. Major John Smith,"

"Well Major Smith and uh..

"Sarah Jane Smith, Captain Sarah Jane Smith,"

"Well Major and Captain Smith could you both come to my office in an hour so we can sort this whole thing out?" rationalized Henry thinking of which drink he would have to use up out of his cabinet this time. They nodded in unison.

Margaret was clearly embarrassed of Henry but kept her rock solid demeanour and was quite impressed with how the Doctor had composed himself clearly a man of high stature as a British civilian .

"Oh yeah Doc and that is the Little Boy Blue you heard this morning Corporal Radar O'Reilly." Klinger concluded indicating Radar who was shovelling the slop into his mouth.

"Sir," Radar simply said shaking both the Doctor and Sarah's hand and then saluting them both before resuming his position of scoffing the contents of his and the Colonel's plates. Major Houlihan decided not to ask her questions now and everyone fell silent and tired to stomach what was in front of them if Radar hadn't consumed it first.

* * *

There we go everyone just about in that . I thought putting the next scene coming in this chapter would be a bit much. Margaret's in this chapter whey clapps lol. And Go Klinger getting loads to say 


	5. Time's Gonna Show Ya

* * *

"So, Major and Captain Smith I just really wanna know a few things," politely assured Henry as he slumped behind his desk. 

"That's fine. Ask away," the Doctor serenely answered not battering an eyelid while Sarah could barely keep the thought of them being "rumbled" from her mind but managed to keep her cool "Have faith in the Doctor" she reassured herself.

"Okie…okay well first really thanks a lot for coming we really appreciate it. Next well really this is about it, um where are your papers I'm sure everything I need to know is on them."

Sarah was in a blind panic.

"Well thankfully they are still in good condition I do believe. Before we had to abandon our position completely we moved our trunk full of medical supplies into a nearby ditch and in it also are our papers and uniforms. They should still be safe. I'll go fetch them now if you wish," the Doctor calmly explained, obviously he'd thought about this.

"I'll have Radar get a jeep ready. Seeing as you've already made friends with Klinger he can take you up there," Henry did not question the Doctor's answer at all.

"Grand," the Doctor terminated the conversation leaving only Sarah Jane confused.

* * *

"So Father Mulcahy, how come you had the pleasure of missing breakfast today?" Hawkeye enquired curiously to the Chaplin just as he finished his blessing of the Doctor's jeep. 

"Major Burns caught me on the way over to the Mess Tent, he wanted forgiveness for his drunken behaviour. Well it began like that then it developed into him ranting about the both of you Hawkeye," Father Mulcahy sighed as he gently patted the red cross on the bonnet of the jeep.

"That's something you don't hear everyday," sarcastically remarked Trapper.

"Indeed," agreed the Chaplin removing his panama hat revealing his greying mousy brown hair.

"Well what do you think of the new recruits Hawk?" Trapper quickly changed the subject.

"Well she seemed like really nervous and he was as cool as a cucumber. I don't care who they are as long as they can help us with the casualties and can hold their drink, right Father?" detailed Hawkeye patting Father Mulcahy on the back.

"Indeed," he agreed once more rubbing smog from his glasses.

* * *

"Hang on Doctor," Sarah Jane grabbed the Doctor's arm "Do you have a plan or not?" 

"For once Sarah I do. For now just lay low and do as I say," the Doctor was aggravated with his companion's thoughtlessness.

"But I want to help you Doctor just tell me what's going on," she answered quite timidly now.

"You've helped enough today and there's no time Sarah. Go and see what Henry wants you to do or ask Radar for some information, just stay out of trouble," the Doctor yanked his arm away from Sarah and strode out to meet Klinger. "There's something not quite right around here and I'm going to fix it," no one but the Doctor heard that last sentence.

* * *

"Oh yeah Doc this our Chaplin Lieutenant Father Francis John Patrick Mulcahy," Klinger had introduced the Chaplin before anybody else had the chance to speak. 

"God bless you Major Smith we've needed the extra help for a long time now and finally our prayers have been answered," gleefully said Father Mulcahy shaking the Doctor's hand.

"Time always tells doesn't it?" the Doctor gave a quick smile and nodded at the presence of Hawkeye and Trapper.

"Yeah I wish time would tell us when we can go home," Hawkeye seethed.

"Indeed but it probably will Hawkeye, it probably will one day," answered the Doctor looking Hawkeye square in the eyes.

Hawkeye was a little shaken because he just couldn't understand how a man who was looking about fifty could have eyes that looked six hundred and fifty and that made him step back a bit and Trapper had noticed too and did the same as Hawkeye. The Doctor nodded once more as if to say "I understand" and positioned himself in the passenger's seat in the jeep. Hawkeye was even more shocked now and motioned to Trapper to follow him to the Swamp for a much need drink. Trapper concurred and followed his best friend.

"Off we go Klinger," the Doctor briskly said rubbing his hands "Time waits for no man."

"You know a lot about time don't ya Doc," Klinger replied as he steered the jeep away from the camp.

"Honestly Klinger I don't know nearly enough about it," Doctor sighed as he gazed at the mountains in the distance.

"I look at those mountains every morning and pray to God no casualties come. Sometimes he keeps up his end of the deal and other times it slips his mind," Klinger purposely changed the conversation and stared blankly at the road ahead. The Doctor noticed the frustration, tiredness and despair in his features and voice.

"I'll do what I can to help Klinger. I promise I'll try," he promised his eyes scanning every detail of the landscape trying to find what was so desperately out of place in this wasteland. Not something pleasant but another evil, another evil that wasn't supposed to be.

Sometime later they arrived near where the TARDIS was.

"Ok now then Doc where is your stuff?" Klinger brought out his rifle, the wind swishing the bottom of his dress as he walked.

"Klinger stay here I'll get them," the Doctor calmly stated

"Doc you ain't even got a rifle come on they won't shoot if I'm around," The Doctor didn't doubt that.

"Klinger I know what I'm doing…trust me."

Klinger didn't question any longer "Ok Doc but I'm keeping watch here," Klinger began to prowl around the area like a lion looking for it's prey.

The Doctor climbed towards the TARDIS. He unlocked the door swiftly, stepped inside and turned to face the outside again taking in all the surroundings.

"Something unearthly is going on and I'm going to be the one that puts it right." pledged the Doctor before ducking back inside the TARDIS and locking the door.

* * *

I finally got some stuff happening now. I had to get this chapter done coz of some people lacking faith in the Doc Go Doctor! lol I was so pleased with how much I wrote for Klinger. Not enough for Radar though sniffs 


	6. The Bold Brigadier

* * *

Hurriedly the Doctor riffled through his gigantic wardrobe tossing clothes aside.

"Like I'm ever going to wear them," he growled tossing a pair of black plimsolls behind him.

"Uh TARDIS kill me if I ever decide in the future that I'm going to wear this.. thing ever," he said quite horrified at the sight of a bright multicoloured coat before tossing it as far as he could down the room.

"Ah finally," he sighed placing two US Army dress uniforms and two work uniforms and two pair of army boots into the medical trunk he had found near his medicine cabinet. He reached a miniscule box which had long since began to collect dust. Inside were many different badges and such. He took out five gold oak leaves (represents the rank of Major) and five sets of a row of bars (represents the rank of Captain) and positioned them on the correct places on the uniforms and on two caps that went with the dress uniforms.

He rushed away then to find some official paper.

"I knew I got the Brigadier to sign pieces of blank paper for a good reason," he grinned as he tucked one piece at a time into an ancient type writer and began to dream up his and Sarah's stories. It was in less than five minutes that the Doctor had finished after checking three times to make sure he hadn't made any mistakes and he bounded back down the corridor towards the medicine cabinet. Grabbing bottles of penicillin and morphine but then he stopped as he saw a few different bottles.

"Would it be wrong to take these? Is it too powerful for the humans? Will it change anything?" he questioned as he picked up the bottles. "Well if there is something that shouldn't be happening here then these won't matter." He stuffed the alien medicine into the pockets of his smoking jacket before returning to the console room to put the final items into the medical trunk.

He locked the door and then quickly checked his pockets for his sonic screwdriver before placing his key into his shoes and strode back down the hill with the medical trunk in his arms.

* * *

"Right uh Captain Sir, Ma'am you don't mind bunking with the other nurses do you coz we need to keep the VIP tents empty," Radar explained as he showed Sarah the way to her new quarters.

"Not at all Radar," she smiled.

"You're bunking with Nurse Kelly, Nurse Sullivan, Nurse Benton, Nurse Yates and Nurse Stewart. They're real nice gals just watch out for Major Houlihan she can be a dragon sometimes."

Sarah thought momentarily that this was a wind up and she expected Harry, The Brigadier, Captain Yates and Sergeant Benton to rush out in drag or something but obviously the Brigadier wouldn't ever be caught out of uniform and Benton Yates and Harry would be sacked if they had done anything remotely like that.

"Oh marvellous I met Nurse Kelly this morning she does seem very lively," she answered trying to not laugh because try as she might she could not get the image of her friends at UNIT in drag doing the Can Can out of her mind. "Oh by the way Radar where is the Major going to be staying? He asked me to find out for him."

"Oh he'll be in the Swamp. That's where all the surgeons stay. So he'll be bunking with Captains Pierce and McIntyre and the Colonel's second in command Major Frank Marion Burns," Radar said with a bit of strangled anger as he spoke about Major Burns.

"Get out of my way worm!" screeched Major Burns as he slithered his way back tot the Swamp slamming his shoulder into Radar as he passed.

"That's him?" mouthed Sarah from behind Frank.

Radar nodded rubbing his right shoulder blade.

"I see."

* * *

Pretty short chapter. Yay Radar got more to say! I dunno why I got Sarah to have that thought. Just a bit of silliness I guess. 


	7. Stronger Than You'd Believe

* * *

"Gee Doc what you got in here, a dead body?" complained Klinger as he attempted to carry the trunk of the Doctor's possessions towards the Swamp.

"Probably," the Doctor answered. "The only thing I couldn't fit in there really was the kitchen sink."

"Ha you're a funny guy Doc," guffawed Klinger trying desperately to keep up with the Doctor's long strides.

"I never really thought about it Klinger but thank you. I don't receive many compliments but that was most appreciated," beamed the Doctor patting his comrade on the back causing Klinger to nearly lose his balance.

"No problem Doc." Klinger dug his heels into the sludge that surrounded the compound and managed to get his footing back as he and the Doctor reached the Swamp.

"No welcome committee for you I'm sorry Doc," joked Klinger as he placed the trunk down at the side of the new bunk that was opposite Trapper's, adjacent to Frank's and in the opposing corner to Hawkeye's.

"They must be on duty Klinger. Hmm, I must find out when my shift is," said the Doctor taking a slightly horrified look at his surroundings then shrugged and sat on his cot.

"Oh, you'll be on the evening shift."

"Splendid, that'll give me time to look around." The Doctor was intent on scouting the area for any strange activity.

"Well, is there anything else Doc? I wanna curl my hair before guard duty tonight," Klinger enquired as he began to step away towards the door.

"No, you've done more than enough Klinger. Thank you kindly," the Doctor politely replied.

Klinger saluted the Doctor and his salute was returned and he marched elegantly across the compound He received a wolf whistle from Nurse Sullivan and he curtsied her in return before entering his own tent with a twirl.

After changing into his uniform and boots, the Doctor put his newly made dog tags around his neck and lay back on his cot staring at an array of cobwebs on the ceiling above him. He chuckled at the sight of the still in front of him as his eyes fell from the infested ceiling. He examined it inquisitively noticing the initiative that had been used to construct it because of the fact all the still consisted of was medical supplies. He then noticed that some of the liquid that it made had been already poured in a martini glass. Taking in its strong stench the Doctor took a quick sip of the transparent concoction. The result of this made him choke slightly and gasp for breathe. He staggered back towards his bunk after putting the glass back down then he slammed his fist against his chest which caused him to cough suddenly then he straightened his posture, took his place on his bunk once more and riffled through his trunk/foot locker for his copies of Oxford, Cambridge, Harvard and Yale's advanced medical journals. He had of course already read the beginners' journals in the TARDIS and he understood the procedures rather well but he needed to know the in depth things. He couldn't be certain but he knew that anything could happen here. It felt like anything could happen, anything at all.

* * *

"Corporal Grant! Speak to me! We know you're still alive come on this isn't a coma! Wake up! Jo! Wake up, please!" pleaded Lieutenant Johnson as he cradled his corporal in his arms. "Baines! Next time the medics come up here _you _make sure Corporal Grant is on it! That's an order Sergeant!" he growled at dark haired youth that he had drawn the attention of. "Whatever's wrong with you Jo, I know I've never seen anything like it before."

* * *

Well another short chapter but I managed to get the story properly on its way. Apoligies for the names of the Corporal and the Sergeant, it seemed like a good idea at the time. The thing with the martini I got the idea after reading a comment and of course how Trapper and Hawkeye always remark how strong it is. 


	8. Strikes, Stripes, Holes And Respect

"So I said sure Hawkeye of course I'll do you a favour," regaled Nurse Yates to her other bunk mates as she sat cross legged on her cot.

"So watcha do Michelle?" queried curious Nurse Sullivan leaning closer.

"I did him a favour. I slapped him across the face and said "There I got rid of some of your dirty thoughts,"" she chortled heartily shaking her bright red hair as she did so.

The girls where in hysterics especially as Hawkeye passed the tent with a plaster over the right side of his face.

"Oh my God Mich, you made him bleed?!" Nurse Kelly said in utter shock.

"Honestly I didn't think I'd do him so much damage. Anyways if you're so worried about him Kel why don't go check on him?" began Nurse Yates again edging towards her Hawaiian friend.

"Yeah Kel. It's soooooo majorly obvious you like him," joined in Nurse Sullivan who stood at the opposite side of Kelly.

"Ok stop it guys. Even if I did like him, which I don't, he'd never go for me," retorted Kelly trying immensely to prevent blushing.

"Oh come on Kel what are you sayin'? You're.."

Nurse Yates was unable to finish her sentence when Nurse Stewart rushed in breathless.

"What's up Alison?" asked Kelly as Captain Stewart slumped on her bunk attempting to regain her breathe.

"It's.. It's.. It's Joanna. The Lewwie list is coming back today and Henry called her into his office to tell her something."

"You mean "The Serge" may be "The Lewwie" now?" questioned Kelly beginning to clap frantically.

"Woah now Kel. Maybe she got demoted or she's getting transferred," Nurse Sullivan jumped in.

"Oh yeah thanks for giving us the optimistic approach Harriet," grouched Nurse Yates sarcastically.

"Well whatever happens we have tah support her one hundred per cent," Kelly concluded "Guys it's her, she's comin' this way!"

They scrambled to the front side of the tent and peered through the material. where the petite Joanna Benton was clutching in her hands her Sergeant stripe and just staring at them as she walked towards her tent.

"Oh My God! They've Court Marshalled her! She's out of the army all together!" cried Sullivan fearfully.

"It can't be discharge because she's not jumpin' for joy about it. They've thrown her out!" Yates growled slamming her right fist into her left hand.

"How the hell did she get a dishonourable discharge. She had to work like no tomorrow to become a nurse. She didn't have the money or the natural ability to be a nurse she told me biology and chemistry was the only subjects she was actually any good at and she only managed to scrape Bs in both of them." Stewart explained.

"We just gotta support her whatever the news," repeated Kelly turning to her friends.

"Yeah and then we're gone crack some heads open, starting with Henry Blake!" bellowed Yates punching her fist through the tent material causing Benton to raise her head in the direction of the tent but the other girls had scrambled back to their bunks just in time for the entrance of their colleague.

She leaned against the door, took a breathe then sat on her bunk in the corner with her friends staring at her. Then she placed her Sergeant stripes on the table between her bed and Captain Stewart's before deciding to speak clutching something tightly in her hands "Girls…I'm not.. A Serge anymore.." her voice trailed off momentarily and she sighed. The hearts of the others began to sink. "I'm.. I'm A.. Gonna be.. A Lewwie!" she shouted the last few words, opened her hands to relieve her Lieutenant's bars.

The girls screamed with delight and group hugged Benton before shouting at her for making them sick with worry.

"Yeah what were ya thinking' Serge.. I mean Lewwie? I was gonna crack Colonel Blake's head open!" yelled Yates playfully hitting Joanna on the shoulder.

Suddenly Sullivan spotted Sarah Jane heading towards their tent "It's the new girl, guys. She's coming!"

"Huh, I don't care how good she is, she ain't makin' me look a fool," Yates spoke pounding her fists together again.

"Yeah, could've become a doctor my bars only a few girls become doctors and she looks like she wouldn't know a scalpel from a suture." Sullivan glared at the stranger.

"We gotta give her a chance guys," pleaded Kelly.

"One shot wouldn't hurt guys," Benton agreed.

"If she's any good I'll give her respect," Stewart announced.

"Yeah sure, if she's any good sure," Sullivan decided to agree with the eldest member of her friends.

"Respect? If she's gonna get respect from me, she's gonna have tah earn it." Yates had decided her eyes still fixed and stern.

As they introduced themselves to Sarah Jane she increasingly got the feeling she had something to prove to them expect for Lieutenant Kelly who seemed the only one that appeared to be happy that she was there. Well she didn't need their respect but she did hope that the Doctor's plan, whatever it was would work.

* * *

Sorry this one took so long. I wanted to do a chapter with just the nurses because they don't get hardly anything to do on the show. The nurses aren't meant to be like the characters in Dr. Who really, well maybe with Captain Stewart but yeah I chose the names because I thought it'd be fun for Sarah Jane lol. Well yeah ok the plot will carry on in the next chapter. 


	9. Bad News A Comin'

* * *

"Corporal!" screeched Burns his lipless mouth creasing into a typical Frank frown. 

"Yes sir!" shouted Klinger and Radar in unison as they stood to attention in front of him, Radar in his proper attire (well if you can call those flea ridden uniforms proper) and Klinger in his fluffy pink dressing gown, army boots, with his hair in curlers, a cigar in his mouth and his rifle over his right shoulder.

"O'Reilly! Corporal O'Reilly!" He stamped his feet firmly on the ground and made himself seem like a four year old rather than a middle aged man.

Klinger trooped away trying to contain his laughter as best he could but failing rather miserably.

"What did you want sir?" Radar questioned placing a serious expression onto his spotted expression and stuffed his giggling deep into his mind.

"The Major, he seems a good decent man but if Pierce and McIntyre get any time with him they'll plant you know… thoughts in his head."

"Heaven forbid sir," Radar uttered with a clear hint of sarcasm.

"What did you say Corporal?" Frank leaned forward so that his "menacing" glare could not be avoided.

"I said "Heaven forbid," sir," Radar repeated dropping the sarcasm from his tone.

"Right then O'Reilly. You make sure that I get to speak with The Major first. You got that?!" he growled jabbing his grubby fore finger into Radar's chest.

Yeah, I got it, sir" he answered turning around instantly with a spark of anger mixed with hate lingering in his eyes. He stepped away from the still screaming Frank and once out from the piercing gaze he rubbed his chest and winced in pain. _Forget it Major I'll keep Hawk and Trap informed, we need a real good prank around here it's been too long._ He smiled to himself and scuttled towards Post Op.

* * *

The Lipless Wonder stood outside his mistress' door preparing his pathetic sop story so that Margaret would comfort him. He gave their new, new secret knock and waited for her answer but there was no answer, not a murmur. Panic stricken he threw the door open and searched the room for her. About to give up he hears her familiar chortle and peaks his head around the door. Walking along with her is the Doctor in the direction of her tent. 

"Really Major, General MacArthur is a friend of yours?"

"Well, he was such a good boy when he was very young I don't quite know what made him so bloodthirsty. It's a shame when good people turn evil like my friend… Well ex friend, Koschei he is so power mad he'd rival, Stalin, Mussolini, Hitler, Fidel Castro and Saddam Hussein," The Doctor's eyes had turned slightly darker thinking of his best enemy, The Master.

"Saddam who?" Margaret was clearly confused having never heard that name before.

"Oh, you wouldn't know him, well not yet anyway. Ok well thank you Major Houlihan I'll bear that in mind. Good day to you. I will see you for my first shift this evening."

"Efficiency, that's what I like to see and finally someone with good manners." Houlihan seemed to be impressed again by the Doctor.

"Yes, good manners seem too hard to come by nowadays. Till we meet again Major." The Doctor replied saluting his fellow officer.

"Indeed." She returned the salute and watched him stride away before drawing her attention to the now worried face of Frank.

"Bear what in mind Margaret?" he asked obviously troubled by what he'd seen.

"Oh Frank don't be such a worrier. I was just telling The Major to bear in mind that some medical decisions are different in the US Army from the British Army so he should bear in mind to make sure to use only US Army methods. He told me he'd use the Yale and Harvard medical texts as references if he needed to. .Anyway Frank he could teach you a thing or two about manners and etiquette y'know," she answered now turning her head back to the direction the Doctor had walked away in.

"What?! Margaret!"

"Good day Major Burns. I'm not to be disturbed until this evening's shift, I have a terrible headache."

Before Frank could react she marched into her tent and slammed the door in his face and before he could make his escape the vultures began to circle.

"Trouble at home, Frank?" questioned Trapper innocently with a mischievous twinkle in his eye.

"The Major has a headache."

"I'm glad you realise what you are, Frank," smiled Hawkeye, patting Frank firmly on the back before leaving for the Swamp still in his Operating gown with Trapper in tow still with that little glint of mischief in his eye.

"You.. You," he managed in defence.

"Why does he always have to offend us like this? We are not, Frank." Hawkeye stepped back towards Frank with a fake, dramatic rage.

"I thought we were becoming better friends, Frank. I guess I was wrong. It's such a shame." Trapper shook his head in dismay and he and Hawkeye continued their quest to find the holy martini glass.

Frank was about to follow them when he noticed a crowd of people laughing at him. He stormed towards the Colonel's office.

* * *

"Captain Smith! Captain!" 

Radar came charging towards Sarah from across the compound.

"Yes, Radar? What's the trouble?" she asked watching the adolescent gasping for breath.

"The.. Major.. Wanted me to.. give you.. these." He dropped the medical journals into her hands. "He said you'd need them for reference and yeah also to make sure you know when his shifts are. He said you'd understand what he meant."

"Yes.. I think I do. Thank you kindly, Radar and by the way slow down you'll hurt yourself if you don't take a break."

"No time, sir.. Ma'am. Can't have this place falling apart," he said before turning on his heels and disappearing into Colonel Blake's office once more.

Sarah noticed that even though it was an arrogant thing to say it seemed quite true. This young boy stopped this chaotic place from falling apart. He had probably been told this because there was a twinge of doubt in his eyes as he said his parting words.

* * *

"Burns! Get out!" bellowed Colonel Blake to his snivelling second in command. 

"Al.. al… alright sir. I'll see you in Post Op la.." Frank's grovelling began.

"OUT!"

Frank scurried away narrowly missing Radar who was entering the Colonel's office with a message in his hands. Henry had to contain his new happiness and delight when he saw what Pierce and McIntyre had stuck on the major's back. It read: _South Korean Peace Offering - Unlikely To Work. War Will Over Run By Five Years. _

"Message from Soeul, sir." Radar handed Henry the message. "It's pretty important."

Henry could tell his company clerk had seen the contents of the letter. In silence he tore up the envelope and quickly read the contents. His head fell and his pressed his hands onto his desk, letting the paper slip to the floor in front of him,his dark eyes filled with sorrow.

"Tell.. Radar tell,…tell Joey to announce that casualties are on their way…at least one hundred of them."

* * *

Sorry it took me so long. So much work from school. It's a real drag. I'll do the best I can with the next chapter. I managed to get to a decent length this time thank goodness. 


	10. Tar and Feather Batter and Bruise

* * *

"Right is that everybody?" the grey haired, stocky ambulance driver asked to Sergeant Baines. 

"God, I hope so but you'll be back soon, Huw," the Sergeant answered with discourage.

"Look here Sergeant Edwards, you take care of Corporal Grant I promised my sister that her boyfriend would be safe." Lieutenant Johnson strode towards the driver, a vein in his temple throbbing

"Aye, of course Alan. You know me mun I'll do what I can. No less," the Welshman promised his friend before turning towards his ambulance to leave.

"Thank you.. Huw. God speed."

Alan's eyes narrowed.

"Aye, thank you. Keep some luck for yourselves. Take care bois. Pob Lwc," Huw matched the Lieutenant's expression.

They silently saluted and Sergeant Edwards raced away in his ambulance striving to keep these young boys he had with him alive. The Lieutenant turned back to Sergeant Baines, nodded and they strode back to the trenches, ready for more fire.

* * *

"Sirs! He's coming!" Radar called to Pierce and McIntyre who were waiting for Burns a few tents away from their own. The other personnel looked on in anticipation as Burns charged towards his tent wishing to stay away from more torture. 

"NOW!" screeched Pierce.

Before Frank could react Private Igor had stuffed a pillow case onto Frank's head and Sergeant Zale had began tying rope around Frank's body .

"GO! GO! GO!" McIntyre ordered.

Klinger sloshed thick Tar over the already helpless Frank.

Pierce and McIntyre grabbed Burns and lifted him and bellowed "CHARGE!!!!!!!!!"

They ran in haste towards the flag pole then propped him up against it and backed away.

"Feather division…Forward march!"

Half a dozen nurses ran towards Frank and battered him with pillows.

"Well, Henry did say get rid of the old pillows before the new ones arrive," grinned Hawkeye looking on at his handy work.

_Attention! Attention all personnel! The neighbours are bringing us more guests. Not long now folks. Be ready to greet them!_

Hawkeye dropped his head down in sorrow and the other's followed his lead. The nurses dropped the empty cases and trooped away. Hawkeye and Trapper went back to the Swamp for a last chug of gin. Radar was left with the now unconscious body of Major Burns with tears forming in his eyes as he stared at the gathering cloud.

* * *

"C-c-corporal?" a stirring wounded Private questioned the upright body of Jo Grant. "Jo?" 

He did not answer just stared with hatred at the ambulance doors.

"You're ok. Why aren't you back at the front?"

He thrust his hand outwards and turned on his heel to reveal glowing green eyes.

"J-J-Jo ?"

"_For nothing is as it should you will be changed from evil to good," _growled the new voice of the corporal.

"W-w- w.." his voice trailed away as the corporal clenched his fist. As he lowered his arm the young soldier's head dropped down and he turned ghostly pale. The corporal took his place once more and sank back into his slumber.

* * *

Radar suddenly heard the familiar din that he dreaded most. He gathered himself, lifted his head and shouted. "CHOPPERS!" 

Seconds later the helicopters were spotted above and Joey gave the announcement.

_Attention! Attention all personnel! Our guests have arrived! Come out to greet them, folks!_

The camp exploded in a rush of kaki as the 4077th made themselves as prepared as they could for their new arrivals.

Sergeant Edwards scrambled his ambulance through the mud and parked beside the entrance to the Pre Op.

"OK, what's the status here, Sergeant?" questioned Frank who had just about managed to remove the last of the goose feather and tar from his uniform.

"Twenty in my van, Major. Another two are on their way with about the same in each . The rest will be on the choppers. Three of mine need immediate surgery, five are on the verge of having one or more limbs turning gang Greene and the rests lucky nearly misses. We tried to patch them up as best we could but we're under heavy enemy fire up there."

"Damn that evil yellow hoard," growled Frank following Huw to the back of the ambulance.

"Frank! I've told you not to say that! Next time I'll put you in a crate and send it to the North Koreans marked _Highly Dangerous. Destroy Immediately," _bellowed Hawkeye as he paced towards the ambulance.

"Um, Sirs can you bicker later, please. These boys need your help now," Huw cut across Pierce and Burns and drew their attention back to the task at hand.

After sending the most injured inside with Frank, Henry and Trapper who had just returned with the Doctor from the landing pads with the last of the casualties.

"Uh, Doctor Pierce?" called Edwards from behind the ambulance his voice shaking.

"What's up Edwards?" Hawkeye marched up to see him sitting in the middle of the two remaining patients looking a sickly green.

"Private Perkins isn't breathing sir. He was one of the least injured boys. I don't understand it sir."

Hawkeye rushed to the side of the Private but before he could attempt CPR, Edwards interrupted "I already tried that sir. He's too cold to be resuscitated, He's been dead awhile." He hung his head. "I couldn't drive any smoother sir, I had to get them here ASAP."

Hawkeye's eyes grew cold "What of the other boy?"

"He seems to be in a coma, sir but it's the strangest coma I've ever heard of. He was barely injured, just a couple of scratches that we managed to patch up," The Sergeant's voice was still trembling.

"Wait here." Pierce jumped from the vehicle and sprinted as if he was escaping to save his life towards Post Op.

"Father Mulcahy, I need you now! Somebody.. didn't make it," his voice trailed away.

Mulcahy simply nodded sullenly and followed. Hawkeye hung back for a moment then poked his head around the Post Op door once more.

"Doctor Smith. Come too."

The Doctor was leaning over a patient whose arm was in a sling.

"Thanks again Doc. You really saved my bacon back there. I'd shake your hand with my good hand if I could sit up," beamed the young fair haired soldier.

"No trouble, dear boy. I'm just sorry you have to go back to the fighting. Get your rest I'll have Captain Smith check on you later. Good day gentlemen." He bowed gracefully and left the room.

He found Father Mulcahy giving Private Perkins his last rights, Hawkeye listening to Corporal Grant's heart and the distraught Welsh Sergeant sitting behind everyone else his eyes darting for one body to the other.

"Doctor Smith, this is Corporal Jo Grant, he was injured on guard duty last night . He was patched up in the Aid Station but is in an unexplainable coma. Have you heard of anything like this before?"

The Doctor for a moment gave a small smile after hearing the boy's name then became engrossed in a deep state of thought and then ran his fingers down the Corporal's trachea.

"No." he replied suddenly. "I'd suggest we keep him under close observation for the next few days Dr. Pierce." The Doctor wasn't even sure if he knew what was wrong with the boy or not.

"Hmm? Right, OK, yeah. " Hawkeye answered completely distracted by the dead solider on the other side of the ambulance.

As they took the body away and took Grant into Post Op Edwards turned to The Doctor "Doc, do me a favour. That boy please make sure he's OK. His Lieutenant is his future brother in law. He's meant to keep him safe for his sister."

"I'll do my utmost but Doctor Pierce is far more skilled so I'll give the job to him," the Doctor replied patting Huw on the back "Good luck back at the front. Hope you can keep as many boys from here as you can."

"Aye, thanks boio. Hope none of your boys fly over the cuckoo's nest." He got into the ambulance and turned back to the Doctor

"Yes, well time will tell won't it?"

"Aye, it always does boio."

The Doctor was struck with surprise and pride all at once and answered with a salute "Cadwch gobaith yn fyw."

Totally taken aback that an Englishman spoke fluent Welsh Edwards saluted and smiled "A tithau 'fyd fy ffrind."

He turned back to the dusty road ahead and drove into the distance.

The Doctor gazed up at the sky just in time to see rain beginning to fall. With a loud sigh he strode into Pre Op.

* * *

Yeah I'm sorry it's been so long but ahve had loads of problems. Sorry about my need to have a welsh character in here. 

Pob Lwc - Good Luck

Diolch - Thanks

Cadwch gobaith yn fyw - Keep hope alive

A tithau 'fyd fy ffrind - And you too my friend

Aye - yes

bois - boys

boio - boy or friend

mun - uhh I dont know what it really means I just use it. I think it my be the same thing as "oh man"


	11. We'll Drink Again

* * *

Hawkeye sat in his melancholy at the foot of his bunk, sipping his martini and humming We'll Meet Again by Vera Lynn.

"A lot of nice songs came out of that war," he said without purpose, taking the last gulp of his drink.

Then suddenly without his mind's consent his body leapt towards his foot locker, wrenched it open, rummaged through its contents, pulled out a small parcel which was wrapped in a hanky and he lay back down on his bunk before opening it. It was the book The Last Of The Mohicans which was where he got his nickname from. He had read this book so many times but it always gave him comfort when he needed it. So he lay down and began to read this familiar tale and as he read he heard the voice of his father telling him the story like he had done when Hawkeye was a child. For some strange moment Hawkeye felt safe. Safe in this, infested, blood stained place. He felt serene and content.

Sometime later he heard the distinct sound of the Doctor but he seemed to be talking to himself.

"We must stop being so arrogant, Doctor, old chap. Makes us look bad. There's a good chap." He tapped himself smartly on the shoulder and made his way towards the Swamp.

"Poor guy's cracked already," muttered Hawkeye turning his attention back to his book just in time for the Doctor to stride through the door.

"Hullo. It's Hawkeye isn't it? Sorry that we haven't been properly introduced." The Doctor extended his hand out.

"Hmm. Well y'know. No matter we were all just real preoccupied with getting those kids patched up. You're name's John isn't it?" Hawkeye shook himself out of his trance and gave the Doctor a firm handshake.

"Yes.. yes I suppose I am.. John. I have the same name as your colleague Trapper? Yes the one with curly hair and the twinkle in his eye. Ah, I see you like to read. Last of the Mohicans definitely a classic."

"Oh, yeah. It was the only book my dad ever read. He named me after one of the characters. I read it every time I need to be reminded of home. So this would probably be my millionth time since I got here. Oh sorry .. Uh do you want a martini. Nine thirty was a very good year."

"Umm.. Maybe later, Hawkeye, thanks. My stomach is trying to digest the gunk we had for breakfast. It won't do me much good to have a hole in it as well," the Doctor answered grasping his oesophagus in memory of his earlier drink of the satanic liquid.

"Yeah it is pretty strong but if you've drunk it for as long as I and Trapper have you're immune to the effects." Hawkeye sat upright and poured himself another martini.

"You're body has probably developed new enzymes to digest all that ethanol."

"Oh yes and they're called Sulphuricacidase," Hawkeye chuckled slightly before draining his glass, patting his stomach and saying "There you go boys. That'll keep going for a week or so."

Trapper soon joined the pair of them and they regaled tales of their time in Korea. The Doctor chose to say as little as possible and just indulged in the stories of the laughter and loses in amongst the wreckage of this "police matter" that Korea was. The Forgotten War, huh. It claimed a quarter of a million lives and it is forgotten. Humans may be brilliant but they are also as ruthless as Sontarans and Daleks at times. In earth's history there has never been peace for long. The longest time there has ever been peace all over the world is thirty five minutes! That is all! But in that time enough people in the third world have died of disease and famine to count as a war. The Doctor suddenly felt sick before shaking himself and suggested a merry game of cards instead to lighten the mood.

Most of the rounds the Doctor won of course but he every so often let Trapper or Hawkeye win because it was the only way he could keep them from drifting off into their tales of lost patients and new ways the enemy had found of mangling the human body.

* * *

Across the compound came a shriek and the nurses from Post Op came rushing across with grins on their faces towards the direction of the noise. The Swamp rats and the Doctor darted after them and pushed their way to the centre of the hullabaloo where there lay Major Burns unconscious on the ground, blood pouring from his nose and Sarah Jane standing above him with her right fist clenched.


	12. Angry Mulcahy and Smith or Am I Alive?

* * *

Trapper took charge immediately. "Right. Listen up everybody. You saw nothing, right?" The crowd grumbled their dissatisfaction.

"GOT IT?!" he bellowed.

The crowd agreed more positively this time.

"Right now, Henry, Radar and Hot Lips can't know this happened and we gotta make sure Frank doesn't know it happened either. Now get back to whatever you were doing. Well go on, get!"

The crowd dispersed quickly and left only the Doctor, Hawkeye, Trapper and Sarah Jane with the unconscious Frank.

"I'll know not to get you mad…ever. I like my nose thanks all the same," Hawkeye said looking at the body of Frank.

"What were you thinking?! He and Hot Lips would have you busted so low that you'd be saluting to Radar!" Trapper demanded the vein in his forehead throbbing.

Sarah stood still her fist clenched and she muttered something that sounded like "mustard" as she's glared at Frank with pure hatred.

"Trapper, this is neither the time nor place we must get him cleaned up and put back in the Swamp before he comes round," the Doctor calmly spoke.

"Trapper, help me carry him into the Swamp," Hawkeye indicated for him to grab Frank's legs, while he took the hold of Frank from under his arms.

They took him into the Swamp and Hawkeye began badgering Trapper "What the hell was that? I don't think she really needs you shouting at her. Stuff the damn Court Marshall!"

The Doctor hung back with Sarah Jane for a second "I'll speak with you later," he snapped before following his inmates back to their cell.

Sarah Jane did not care what anybody else thought, what that foul piece of excrement had said was unforgivable.

"Deserved it," she growled before storming off towards her tent.

* * *

"You sure he doesn't know, Klinger? There's nothing that Radar doesn't know about this place," Trapper questioned the Lebanese corporal who was starting his nightly guard duty.

"Pretty sure. Radar is as clueless as Macarthur in a MASH," he answered adjusting his evening gown.

"Well, we might as well give ourselves up now, guys," interrupted Hawkeye sarcastically.

There came a rapping on the door of the Swamp. Hawkeye answered it and so Nurse Sullivan standing in the doorway panic stricken.

"So, you changed your mind about my offer yet?" Hawkeye asked casually leaning against the door frame.

"Hawkeye, if you try flirting with me one more time, I'll smack yah worse than Sarah Jane did to Major Burns and that's a promise." she threatened pressing her forefinger into his chest.

"Ok, ok! I believe you," he quickly answered rubbing the cut on the side of his face. "So, uh what did you come knocking on my door for, then? Henry catch his finger in his fishing hooks again?"

"No! It's your patient Private Joshua Wright, he's fitting violently. Kelly's in there now trying to stop the fitting but it's not working and his friend Private David Waters that Doctor Smith operated on is shouting abuse at the nurses for letting this happen to him. Now we've checked his medical history and there's nothing and he's not an epileptic."

"He might've reacted to the drugs," Hawkeye answered sprinting ahead of Harriet to Post Op. "Oh and get Father Mulcahy to calm down Mister Waters."

* * *

"Now, calm down, my son. The Doctor's trying his best to help your friend. You shouting at him won't help," patiently spoke Father Mulcahy patting the raging Private Waters on the arm.

"He promised Josh that he'd be alright! And he's not! Look at him! He's gonna die because the Doctor doesn't know what he's doing!" growled Waters trying to get up from his cot.

"Now, now son of course he knows what he's doing. Joshua will be fine," reassured Father Mulcahy placing his hands on Waters' shoulders.

"NO!" he screamed, fighting Father Mulcahy "I've had enough of reassurance! He's going to die and it's all that Son Of A Bitch's fault!"

Mulcahy had had enough. He punched David in the stomach and he fell back, winded and curled himself into a ball.

"Now, be nice and love thy mender, or I'll punch your lights out!" screeched Mulcahy before storming out of Post Op.

Suddenly a click of fingers was heard and the fitting Wright lay silent and was breathing naturally again.

"Well, now that changes everything. Angry priests seem far more effective than softy priests. Go Father Mulcahy!" chuckled Hawkeye, wiping sweat from his brow.

* * *

The sickening silent night sucked the life out of the camp. In Post Op the sleeping Wright awoke to see Corporal Grant standing over him.

"Hey Jo, we thought you was in a coma. You recovered real quick. Glad you're better."

Grant's gaze was fixed and stern and he moved his hand towards the candle on Wright's desk.

"Oh that, you want it by your bed? The Father gave it to me. He said it's very spiritual . Helps with my fear of the dark."

Grant still reached for the light his glowing eyes now fixed on Wright

"You sure you're alright?" he looked concerned and slightly scared at the manic stare on his Corporal's face.

"_Darkness claims the evil ones. Time you joined the devil, my son."_

And with that Grant pressed his fingers against the flame and the light extinguished immediately. There amongst the darkness was a shallow breathe then final silence.

* * *

Soundlessly Grant crept into Radar's office. He cocked his head to one side at the sight of Radar's sleeping form cuddling his teddy. He stood over him and smirked as Radar did not stir. Slowly he moved his outstretched right hand down over Radar's face.


	13. Dead Men's Friends Tell Meaningful Tales

* * *

The next morning Radar felt dreadful. It felt like he'd drank tequila all night then whacked his head several times against an anvil. Maybe he had a bad grape ne-hi at Rosie's. The unforgiving sun burned his eyes as he began his mail call duties.

"I've never seen something like this before. It doesn't add up. He wasn't even that badly injured. A dislocated shoulder at the worst. He was in a deep coma and seemed at one point almost brain dead. And now he's sitting up and eating as if nothing had happened! He can't have been faking it no one can fake being brain dead!" Hawkeye was outside Post OP ranting at Henry.

"I don't know what the doozy it is either, Hawkeye," answered Henry realising that his substitute for swearing sounded terrible "We just have to treat this kid like any other patient… Radar!"

"Sir?!" yelped the young man trying to make his wincing as unnoticeable as possible.

"Check the files on this kid and if ya can get a hold of the commander his outfit," politely asked Henry.

" Yes…"

"… sir?"

"Yeah, that's what I meant oh and here's your mail," Radar distantly answered keeping his eyes closed to avoid the judgemental and unforgiving glare of the sun. He thrust his hands out in front of the two superiors and placed the mail in their hands before scuttling away to avoid Frank Burns or Margaret Houlihan screeching at him.

Henry and Hawkeye watched him leave and sniggered quietly to themselves before turning their attention to their received mail. Sniggering once more they swapped letters and strolled off in the direction of the Mess Tent.

* * *

For once everyone was cheerful over breakfast choosing to forget the slop that hovered below their noses. Everything seemed brighter.

Father Mulcahy rushed in.

"Come…now.. Wright.. He's. not.. Breathing," gasped the clergyman beckoning for Hawkeye and Margaret to follow him.

Without hesitation they jumped up out of their seats and sprinted after the terrified priest.

Just as Hawkeye began to administer CPR, Sarah Jane came in, her arm holding the weight of Private Waters as he hobbled beside her. His eyes flashed with anger and despair as he saw his friend lying motionless on his cot.

"Get him, outta here, Smith!" bellowed Hawkeye before Waters had the chance to respond.

Spotting Father Mulcahy, Waters decided to remain quiet as he limped and propped himself on the edge of his bed and helplessly watched as his friend made no attempt to awaken. Some minutes later Hawkeye ceased his attempts and silently beckoned Margaret and Father Mulcahy towards him.

"This is not gonna work. He's been dead too long. I dunno how no one noticed but this guy died sometime last night," he solemnly whispered running a hand through his raven -like hair.

"Why did you…" began Margaret slightly befuddled.

"… for the sake of another's hope, Major," answered Father Mulcahy, shifting his head a

little to indicate the boy who's heart was breaking behind them .

Margaret solemnly nodded her understanding "Do you propose we.."

".. continue? No. That kid has waited long enough to know." Hawkeye cleared his throat and spoke louder "So we're all agreed?"

Father Mulcahy and Margaret slowly nodded.

"Right then, time of death 10:43am"

Instead on screeching in blind rage Waters fell to his knees and began weeping softly.

Hawkeye lowered his tone "Father, I have a mission of mercy for you. Find the person who was on duty last night and try and get a confession out of them."

Margaret instinctively approached Waters and attempted to comfort him and told Sarah Jane to leave. Still a little irritable from the day before she nodded curtly and left.

* * *

The rest of the morning remained sombre as the news of Private Wright's death spread all through the camp. And as people came to give their sympathy to Waters all he could do as they kept stating Wright as "Private Wright" was screech "He was a human being not just some soldier, his name was Joshua, a real person not some tin man!" and then would just turn his head back to the floor and begin shaking again.

Waters' angry outbursts aided Father Mulcahy's mission by sending many distraught members of the 4077th to darken his door. Each of them gave him the same story. Each distraught more by Waters' understandable vicious outburst than of young Joshua's death,. It saddened John Mulcahy so much that it made him so bitterly sick to his stomach that felt the slop that he could normally keep down rising swiftly in his throat. Despite this being the man that he was he'd never let it show. He had all but given up hope when Radar opened the door somewhat and peeked his head through the gap.

"Father.. Lieutenant Sullivan is here to see you."

"Let her in, Radar."

The dark haired Lieutenant Harriet Sullivan stepped inside the Chaplin's home and sat limply on the chair which Father Mulcahy indicated with his left hand.

"I'll.. Wait outside, ok, Harriet? " Radar timidly asked backing towards the door.

"No, no… stay, please, Walter," she clutched onto Radar's jacket and tugged him towards her as she began to cry into his chest and he hesitantly stroked her hair in attempt to calm her.

"Lieutenant? Does what you've come here for have anything to do with young Joshua Wright's death? " enquired Mulcahy leaning towards her, placing a comforting hand on over the hand which was not clutching to her safety net that was Radar. Tearfully glancing up at Radar who slowly nodded she then turned to the priest and after taking a sharp breath she confessed to Father Mulcahy that she was on duty when Wright had died. Waters' emptiness made her open up to Radar. She had only left for a few moments to make herself some tea and all she noticed that was strange when she returned was the fact that the candle Father Mulcahy had given him was extinguished. Wright seemed peaceful, but still seemed so life like.

"I… remember the last words I heard him say… "Seeing as I'm going home it will be nice to see my father one more time before the cancer takes him, he's hanging on for me to see him one last time."" She trembled against Radar "He smiled as I left. Such a hopeful smile. It tears me apart to think that I robbed the boy of that one thing he wanted most. "

Mulcahy squeezed her hand assuredly but as she began to feel better her guardian crumpled to the ground fitting violently.

Radar's mind was watching all this happen but could not control the body. All of Radar's muscles contracted then relaxed then continued in that process for some moments. Harriet was too overcome by tears to scream. Father Mulcahy turned pale and tried also to speak. Finally Radar's muscles contracted once more and his body remained that way with his back arched severely. His body was in the position of a victim who had just died of cyanide poisoning.

"Hawkeye!" Mulcahy shrieked. The only word he could manage as he fell to his knees beside Radar trembling madly.

Radar's head flopped to one side, his eyes glassy and vacant.

* * *

Really sorry for taking so long I have only just finished my exams. Been really hetic. Hoping to get chapter 14 up in the next couple of days.


	14. Sympathy For The Corporal

Hawkeye who was sprawled across his cot catching what little sleep he could leapt up suddenly at the eerie scream of Mulcahy calling him. As if running from a predator he pelted towards the priest's tent where he was joined by Trapper, Henry and Margaret as well as some onlookers.

"After you, Maestro," offered Trapper.

Giving him a quick nod Hawkeye raced into the tent to find Mulcahy searching for what had harmed Radar, Harriet quivering and sobbing as she gazed at Radar's distant expression and Radar's body in the position of a terrified cat who had failed to land on its feet. Hawkeye could hardly believe his eyes. He stepped back to the doorway, opened it again and stood in front of Henry.

"Look, Henry me, Trapper and Margaret will be fine here you carry on to Post OP."

"No, Pierce. Mulcahy may have screamed for you but I'm sure not gonna leave," replied Henry, pushing Hawkeye out of the way and shoving his way through the door.

"Henry, don't!"

***

Everything seemed to be in slow motion. Radar could hear nothing and only had a limited view point. He was being pushed along through the camp on a gurney with most of the 4077th's personnel surrounding him. Colonel Blake was at the left side of his head trying to keep him calm by speaking to him but it was no use in Radar's present vegetated state. Sarah Jane was on his right side tearfully smiling at him and gripping his hand tightly but he couldn't feel a thing. The Doctor, Trapper and Hawkeye were trying to keep the nurses away from the gurney and Margaret was ordering Klinger, Zale and Igor who were pushing the gurney to hurry up. Father Mulcahy was trying to pray for Radar but kept being shoved by Nurse Yates and Stewart. Harriet was close behind Sarah Jane looking so detached from reality as she stared blankly down at Radar's mangled body. He attempted with all his might to grasp her hand with his free hand but no matter how much he tried his arm wouldn't move. Moments later Radar blacked out.

***

At the foot of his bed Harriet and Sarah Jane sat.

"If Radar dies…" began Harriet feeling her stomach wretch with each word she said.

"He won't Harriet, Hawkeye has made sure of that," Sarah reassured her.

"If Radar dies, I…I don't know what I'll do," continued Harriet as if Sarah had not spoke a word at all.

"He won't," Sarah repeated placing a comforting hand on Harriet's shoulder.

Harriet turned her head away to see Henry who was on duty at the time looking back at Radar every few seconds just to see if he had improved.

"Poor Henry," she wept gently.

Radar seemed just to be sleeping angelically in the hospital bunk with his arm around his teddy bear which Kellye had given to him after Hawkeye and Henry had managed to relax his muscles and stop his erratic breathing. His cap and glasses had also been delicately placed onto his face.

***

That night Sarah Jane and the Doctor intent on discussing the strange goings on left Post Op for the Officer's Club. Radar was in the same state he had been previously and on the cot next to him Nurse Sullivan had fallen asleep grasping his hand.


	15. Radar's Back?

***

Three days later as the dawn broke; Henry lay on the bunk next to Radar reading the new Archie comic that had arrived for him. Henry soon fell asleep and at that moment Radar sat up in bed and began searching for his clothes at the side of the bed. As he stood up his chest seemed much larger than it had previously and his arms and legs were wider. He managed to pull on his trousers but could not put his belt around him. When he put his shirt on as he put his arms down it ripped across his shoulders. He looked at it in disgust but carried on getting dressed. Before leaving he looked at the bear on his bed, and then noticed Henry asleep on the next cot. He took the bear off the bunk he had just been lying on and placed it under Henry's right arm before stepping out onto the compound.

Looking around he sniffed the air realizing that there was an alien in the camp. He punched his right hand into his left and grinned menacingly. He returned to Post Op and sat himself down next to the sleeping form of Corporal Grant and whispered in his ear. Lifting his head away a smile just as menacing as his own appeared on Grant's face, then it disappeared as Henry began to stir.

Radar jumped to his bunk and removed his clothes. He shut his eyes just as Henry came around. He sighed with discontent when he saw that Radar had still not improved. He scratched his head in confusion when he saw Radar's bear under his arm, then placed it back next to Radar. Patting him gently on the shoulder, Henry backed away from the cot and began to make his way out of Post Op.

"S-s-sir?" shakily asked Radar as he slowly opened his eyes.

Henry stopped dead in his tracks. Turning on his heels he saw the befuddled face of his company clerk looking up at him.

"W-w-what am I doing in Post Op?"

"Radar you're ok!" Henry beamed, galloping towards him and giving him an almost spine cracking hug.

"Gee, Colonel I hope I didn't cause you guys any trouble," Radar apologetically answered. Usually he'd be choked in a hug that tight but it didn't seem to bother him at all.

"Not at all, Radar. Just mighty glad you're ok," croaked Henry trying to hold back his tears of relief.

"So, should I start this morning's mail call?" Radar queried innocently.

"Nah don't worry Captain Smith has agreed to do it for you. You just rest, Radar. Harriet wants to come see you later anyway so I'll get her to bring you a grape ne-hi. I've.. Gotta tell everybody else! Glad to have you back, Radar." Henry jumped up from beside his cot and rushed out of Post Op and went to tell anybody who would listen.

"They really love you here, kid, don't they?" Private Waters said sitting up in his bunk.

"I guess they do," Radar responded, a little smirk appearing on his face.

"Hey!" Waters called to him "don't you forget that."

***

"That's mighty swell of you, Captain Sullivan to get me a ne-hi."

Radar yanked the cap off the bottle and chugged the ne-hi down in one.

"I guess you were pretty thirsty after being asleep for three days," the bemused Harriet answered smiling awkwardly at him. "I'd like to thank you, Radar for…"

She seemed to trail off as Radar focused his attention on the Doctor who ambled into Post Op and began checking the other patients.

"Yeah," he answered as he realized Harriet had stopped talking. "Look Captain I don't know why but I'm still real tired so I'd let to get some rest please."

"Uh, sure ok, Radar, I'll see you later, ok?" Harriet backed away from his cot embarrassed and headed out of Post Op, bumping into the Doctor on her way out.

"S-sorry Major,"

Her voice shaking as she sprinted out towards the nurses' tent.

"Harriet? What's wrong?" called Sarah Jane after her but Harriet continued to run out of sight.

Utterly bewildered by what had happened the Doctor turned his head towards Radar who seemed to be glowering at him for a second before turning his head on his pillow to sleep.

***

The next day Radar had insisted on carrying on with his old duties only after promising Henry he'd let Klinger take over if it was too much for him. As he reached the nurses' tent Nurse Yates emerged gripping him in a hug just as tight as Henry had the day before.

"Heya, kiddo. We been mighty worried about ya," she beamed as she let him go.

"Hey Mich, leave some of Radar for the rest of us!" grinned Nurse Benton grabbing hold of Radar and patting him squarely on the back.

"Mail for you, officers," he simply said holding out the mail to them with a blank expression on his face.

"Ah thank ya, kiddo. Glad you're back, Sarah Jane was total crap at it!" she chortled loudly taking her mail from the company clerk.

"Keep your comments to yourself, Michelle," Sarah Jane pushed past her colleagues and embraced Radar. "How are you, Radar?" she queried with a soft smile.

"Fine thank you, Captain," he answered plainly.

Kellye and Stewart joined the other nurses and took their turns in attempting to squeeze the life out of Radar.

"Excuse me, Officers I have a letter for Nurse Sullivan. Where would I find her?" he asked without showing an iota of emotion towards any of them.

"She's in the showers, Radar we'll take it for you and give it to her when she comes back," the matriarch of the nurses Captain Stewart injected.

"Ok, Captain," Radar turned towards her and handed her the letter. "Have a good day, won't you." and with that he strode off towards the Swamp.

"Corporal!"

He turned to face the voice that was calling him. Major Houlihan.

"What can I do for you, Major?" he enquired refusing still to show any emotion which normally would be anxiety in front of the Head Nurse.

"Are you well enough to get back to work?" she barked at him.

"Perfectly, Major Houlihan," he answered clearly instead of stammering as he usually did in her presence "So don't worry about me infecting you."

Of course she wouldn't be concerned about his well being, he was an enlisted twerp.

She seemed mildly shocked by this but before she could react he interrupted her

"I have to carry on with mail call, Major."

He saluted and marched off for the second time towards the Swamp.

At the entrance to the ragged and rank tent of the surgeons he stood for a mere second before the door burst open and Major Burns stood in front of him with his usual sour expression.

Before he was able to make any sort of remark Radar thrust three letters into his hand and stepped into the Swamp behind him.

Hawkeye shrieked with delight and sprang from his bunk to strangle Radar in an embrace.

"Two letters from your father, sir," came the muffled response from the smothered Company Clerk.

"All Hail the Great Radaro!" hollered Hawkeye dropping to his and bowing several times, Trapper guffawing behind him.

"A letter from your daughters, Captain McIntyre," Radar stepped past Hawkeye seemingly oblivious of the mock grovelling.

"Thanks buddy," Trapper answered simply with a broad grin.

"See you at dinner, Sirs," Radar responded turning away and leaving the Swamp. Hawkeye and trapper were left in stunned silence gaping at the space in the tent where Radar had been.

On his way to his office Radar saw the Doctor leaving the Mess Tent.

This time the Doctor knew for certain that the young man was glaring at him now. Something was very wrong.

***

It was sometime during the wee hours of the morning when Harriet decided she couldn't sleep and would go and ask Hawkeye for some gin. She picked up her metal canteen next to her bunk, put her boots on, wrapped her dressing gown tightly around her pajamas and set off towards the Swamp. She didn't expect anyone to be around but someone was waiting for her. From the corner of her eye she saw Radar standing outside the Post Op door, watching her. He was in just his khaki trousers and his chest was more solid than it seemed before. When she faced him a smirk crept onto his face. His eyes were transfixed with an unreadable glint in them. Despite this un-Radar like behavior Harriet wasn't at all afraid. Lifting his index he beckoned her towards him. There was no reason for her to be fearful, she trusted him and so followed.


End file.
